Home again

Ben has been gone on one of his Reserve weekends again. This month it was actually a long weekend, on which he had to leave Wednesday night to report Thursday morning. I have learned that my daughters are completely incapable of understanding periods of time, and that although I told them numerous times Daddy is coming home Sunday it did nothing to assuage their sadness. Last night was especially rough - Jocelyn bounced back and forth between her bed and mine all night long, and Molly woke up just before 1am and screamed for about an hour. I had flashbacks to five years ago, when Ben would go underway when Ava was an infant. She would be okay for the first couple days, but around day 4 or 5 she would just lose it. There's that sense that something's not right, but not being able to process what it is or how to deal. I knew we had hit that point today - all the girls were just in a funk. Molly wanted NOTHING to do with me, Jocelyn was moodier than usual, and Ava cried at least twice when she "really missed her Daddy."

At 7:15 this evening, Daddy finally returned. Ben commented later that I didn't really say hi to him when he walked in the door. Truth was, I knew we would get to catch up once the girls went to bed, and I wasn't about to fight these girls for his attention. They were all standing at the door anxiously awaiting his entry after he parked in the driveway. Ava performed for her Daddy, Jocelyn tackled him with random hugs, and Molly crawled into his lap to watch a little TV before bedtime - something she would rather jump off a building than do with me. I don't think Ben realizes just how much he's missed each time he's away, even for a short time. We are all glad to have him back, and I look forward to returning to normal life with children who actually like me again.