The first lesson was about setting priorities. Today was supposed to be Ava and Jocelyn's first dance class of the new year. While Jocie doesn't fully comprehend that she even missed out on anything today, Ava was pretty upset. This morning Ava wanted me to do her hair so it would be ready for class in the afternoon. When I said we would be missing class today, she got the big puppy dog eyes that filled with tears and said, "But MOM, I've been waiting since 8 o'clock last night for the first day of dance class!!" I felt really guilty for letting my child down so. But I stood firm and explained that while I rarely make her miss dance, sometimes there are occasions that are more important. Family, especially family we don't see often, will take precedence over after school activities any day. It took Ava a while to be okay with my decision, but in the end she admitted that she had fun getting to spend time with my aunt and that she understood why she needed to miss dance this one time.
Then as we were waiting to pick Aunt Cindy up from the arrivals area of the airport, Ava noticed that the flags were flying at half-mast and asked me why they weren't "all the way to the top." So I explained as best I could to my almost-seven-year-old about what happened on September 11, 2001. It was the first such conversation I've had with Ava, in which I was delicately finding the balance between making her aware of serious and scary aspects of life without causing her to feel paralyzing fear. I was most touched by her two questions after my explanation: were there any children who died, and did any other children become orphans that day. She made the discussion relatable to herself with a wisdom and understanding I have not seen in her before. I am never happy to have reason to have such conversations with my children, but at the same time I appreciate and welcome these difficult talks as a way to teach my kids about the dark side of life and how not to take for granted the blessings we all have.
Finally it was just time to kick back and have fun with Aunt Cindy! It was so nice for me to get to catch up with my aunt and hear about one cousin's wedding and get caught up on the lives of the rest of the family. Jocelyn of course took all of five minutes to warm up and in no time was giving Cindy random bear hugs and trying to drag her all over the house. The time seemed to fly, and before we knew it we were loading up to take her to her hotel for the evening. It was a short but lovely visit. After Aunt Cindy had gotten out of the car but before she had gotten her luggage out of the trunk, Jocelyn said to me, "Mommy, I hope we get to see her again soon!" It's been five years between the last two visits, and I too hope it's not nearly that long until we get together again.
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