The Power of Dance

Today's highlight was the hour-and-a-half that all of us girls spent at Chris Collins Dance Studio. I don't know if it was the full moon last night or what, but today the girls all decided that rest was highly overrated - Molly only took one nap for MAYBE an hour (most of which ended up being on my lap instead of her bed), and Jocelyn did not nap AT ALL. I knew that the final few hours of the day, aka the Witching Hours, would be even tougher than usual. We were all very much looking forward to our time at CCDS. Jocelyn is friends with all of the "big kids," and it takes only minutes for her to run off and find someone not yet in class to play with. Molly now enjoys toddling around the studio as well, and tries to escape me at every chance. Both girls REALLY love watching dance classes. When they have the chance, they will stand in the doorway mesmerized at the amazing things happening on the dance floor. I myself enjoy sitting in the lobby and having some semblance of adult conversation with the other parents waiting on their dancers. On Tuesdays I even get a 15 minute break to myself, when some of the dancers have extra time between classes, and after getting ready love to play with my kids. Each child has her favorite of course - Jocelyn's BFF is a girl named Casey, while Molly loves her some Miss Victoria, one of the assistant teachers who has also been a frequent babysitter for us. There were of course meltdowns upon leaving the magical world of dance class (mainly by Jocelyn today), and bedtime couldn't come fast enough once we got home, but that short break this evening certainly saved all of us from most certain and immediate insanity.

On the Other Side :)

Finally, a day that was better than the last! :) Today I was extra aware of the small things that make for a good day: feeling human was a great start. I still have a slightly bloodshot eye, but no migraine of body aches make the physical appearance much more bearable. I was WAY more productive today - washed dishes, completed multiple loads of laundry, and cleaned up rooms that over the weekend went by the wayside. My children were... well, still my children. They had their good moments and not-so-good moments, and we all took them in stride - no tears and very few raised voices. My two funny stories of the day: Ava informed me this morning that she should talk as much as possible so that way her mouth is too busy to suck her thumb. (It makes my head hurt on so many levels...) Then later Jocelyn was whining about something I told her to do. She said "BUT MOM..." Then there was this pause. She looked at me and said, "Mommy, you say no buts, Jocie Rose!" Glad to know even if she doesn't respond at least she hears me when I'm talking to her ;)

It always seems so hard when I'm not feeling well to remember just how quickly the illness passes. In the grand scheme it's a small blip forgotten almost immediately, but at the time it seems I'll feel sick forever and never be the same. But today I regained my perspective. I know this weekend was miserable more times than not, but today is Monday, the start of a new and much better week. My physical and emotional strength is returning with a vengeance, and I am excited to tackle whatever life brings in the days to come. I've heard the saying that if there was no "bad" you would not be able to appreciate how good the "good" really is. I am just really hoping I've had enough bad recently to keep me appreciating the good for a good long while.

Tears of Healing

Well, today did not start off well. At all. I woke up still feeling pretty sick, with a swollen eye and achy body. But it's Sunday, which means Mass. I decided I'd try to suck it up and make a go at attending Mass with the family. Boy what a HORRIBLE idea that was. All 3 girls were pretty miserable and did not behave well. But the biggest problem was me - I did not have the patience to deal with my children. I was tired and sick, and thus did not make for an understanding Momma. During the consecration I literally had all 3 kids trying to get my attention. (Let it be known that Ben was helping as much as he could, but like most kids mine feel they must always go to Momma first.) I finally snapped - I grabbed Molly (who needed to be taken to the back anyway) and went to the bathroom, where I proceeded to let myself cry for about a minute. Feeling I could pull myself together for the end of Mass, I returned to my family to finish things up, but I cried all the way home, and probably for a solid 15 minutes or so once we got in the house.

I have been trying so hard the last week or so to be Superwoman - taking care of sick kiddos, doing the usual house cleaning, and keeping myself healthy. I am usually pretty good at keeping my head above water, but today I had to let go and let myself have a good cry. The nice thing was, it helped me a lot! I think the crying flushed some of the gunk out of my eye, and now it's feeling a little better. But more importantly I cried all the bad emotions out of my system. I'm no longer bitter and upset for my children not behaving exactly as I think they should. I'm not embarrassed, disappointed, or depressed. I do not consider myself to be an overly emotional person, but I have learned to accept and even embrace these occasional cleansing cries. I've wiped the slate clean, and despite a VERY rocky start that's a nice way to start off the week.

Tomorrow

Today was not my best day. Ben was gone most of the day doing reserve stuff, and the girls and I stayed home and honestly did little more than drive each other crazy. We ended the day with a nice dinner out and even shopped for some flower girl dresses for Ava and Jocelyn, which was fun when the girls weren't running circles in the dressing room. But tonight I have no fun anecdote, no warm fuzzy of some cute thing that made my day. I am grateful tonight for this blog, and for those of you who read it and give me feedback now and then. Forcing myself to write this tonight is a good reminder that even though today was not wonderful, I will blessed with another day tomorrow. I can only hope and pray that tomorrow will be a better day than today, and if not that I will have the patience and grace to handle whatever may come my way.

Through Sickness

Tonight Jocelyn and I got to have an impromptu bonding night in the local emergency center. Nothing serious - just getting ourselves checked out for the pink eye Ava was gracious enough to share with us. Jocelyn didn't show any symptoms until almost 5pm, so we headed out after dinner at almost 7:30pm. Nice thing was it was VERY quiet tonight, and we were in and out in just over an hour. I was a little nervous about how she'd behave with it being so close to bedtime, but I think she enjoyed some one-on-one attention from Momma, even if it had to come in the form of side-by-side medical exams. It was a nice quiet time for me to realize just how much she's growing and maturing into her own unique, beautiful person. I would rather not have ended my Friday night in the ER, but can think of few others I'd like to have shared such a night with :)

Better Late...

I'm a little late on this entry, which should be for yesterday. I didn't get around to writing it last night because I felt AWFUL. Not really sick, just completely run down for some reason. I was in bed at 9 and asleep by 9:15! It was also somewhat of a long day because we spent the whole morning dealing with Ava and her sudden onset of conjunctivitis (aka pink eye). I dropped off Jocelyn at school at 9, walked around Target stalling until Ava's dr. appointment at 10:15, headed to the pharmacy by 11 where they did NOT have our prescription ready, picked Jocelyn back up at noon to go back to the pharmacy and finally get home just before 1pm. Not really how I had planned to spend my morning - usually Thursdays are just Molly and I, and I get cleaning done around the house while she keeps me company and plays. But throughout all the loading and unloading in the car and the many wait times throughout the morning, Ava and Molly were both excellent. I would not have blamed them for getting antsy and bored - I felt that way myself - but they just took it all in stride and went with the day. I am truly grateful for such well-behaved kids, especially on days that don't quite go as planned.

Mother Nature Weirdness

Today was an absolutely BEAUTIFUL day. Someone clearly forgot to tell the weather this is February in Washington, DC, because it was almost 70 degrees and not a cloud in the sky. This meant after naptime we all went outside and played in our front yard for the first time since we moved here. (Well, the first time snow wasn't involved, anyway) It was so much fun! Ava and Jocelyn kicked the soccer ball around with Ben and I. Molly was very weirded out by the sensation of standing on grass and stayed in one spot most of the time. After a little while some of our neighbors emerged, and the girls got to play with their friends while we had the chance to talk to our new neighbors and get to know them a little better. It was such a rare treat, the mild weather. I have no illusions that it will last, but I will take today and be very grateful for it.

Yay outside!!

Getting the hang of kicking the soccer ball

This grass stuff is WEIRD!

Jocie pouting for some unknown reason

Molly taking a turn at kicking the soccer ball

The girls and one of our neighbors playing hopscotch

Molly stealing a turn on Jocelyn's scooter

Life is GOOD :)

As if this weren't enough, tonight I am also thankful for my papasan chair. Ben and I bought this silly chair when we first got married. We received a few gift cards from Pier 1, and to be honest there was not much besides a papasan chair from that store that I wanted. Unfortunately, it's rarely fit in any of the places we've lived. In this new house, it currently sits in our study. Tonight, I cleared it off and sat and read for an hour or so. It is SO comfortable - it seems to cradle me as I relax and have some me-time at the end of the day. I am very excited to have rediscovered this little jewel of furniture, and look forward to many more evenings nestled in its welcoming seat.